Iowa State Football Bashing Thread

Discussion in 'Hawkeye Football' started by YugoslavianMountainHound, Aug 10, 2015.

  1. YugoslavianMountainHound

    YugoslavianMountainHound Silver spoon

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    I know we have the "Soulmate for Iowa pessimists" thread and some miscellaneous ones but we need a quasi-official thread to mock them.

    Pandy had an article today alluding to ISU's oline perhaps being the best in the BXII.

    Then there's this tweet where you can't get a better dichotomy between the subject line and the dumpy physiques of the picture. Campos' ability to be pudgy at "6'8" is nothing short of amazing.

     
  2. Malickfan

    Malickfan Needs to GFH

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  3. Lime

    Lime Needs to GFH

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    always worth pointing out that Ricky Stanzi has as many bowl wins (3) in 2.5 years as a starter as their program does in its history.
     
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  4. Gushawk

    Gushawk Jalapeño Penus Administrator

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    I'm torn about participating in this thread, despite my confidence that they'll again be an extremely shitty football team that is near and likely the worst on our schedule. (Thanks, Kirk.)

    Fuck them and their likely win over Iowa right in their shit asses.
     
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  5. howler

    howler Totally Not a Spartan Fan

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    Ol' Rick's teams outscored ISU 87-15 in his 3 games between '08 and '10.
     
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  6. HawkLax6

    HawkLax6 Thinks the 2 Deeps Matter

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    That was always my favorite, but my new favorite might be that TCU dropped three spots in the CFP poll after winning by only 52 points over Iowa State.
     
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  7. Lime

    Lime Needs to GFH

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    I have it as co-#1
     
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  8. YugoslavianMountainHound

    YugoslavianMountainHound Silver spoon

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    Paul Rhoads is adamant that shouldn't have happened.
     
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  9. douglasbader

    douglasbader Was Right at the Time

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    No way. The fact that Ricky Stanzi has as many bowl victories as Iowa State does in their 123 year history is the best thing ever.
     
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  10. KitKatApples

    KitKatApples Needs to GFH

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    They also lost to drake in football once.
     
  11. Talkin' Goat

    Talkin' Goat Lothario

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    And to them in basketball the same year.
    [​IMG]
     
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  12. Hawk_Kegmasters

    Hawk_Kegmasters Saw Spice World in Theaters

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    I hope all Cyclones die of the AIDS which they contracted from fats niang.
     
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  13. Gushawk

    Gushawk Jalapeño Penus Administrator

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    It's Tits Niang.
     
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  14. wondergrape

    wondergrape Needs to GFH

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    A funny joke is to refer to the University's hometown as "Lames". Not only is this a clever play on words, but it connotates the degree to which the town is below standard in numerous subcategories.
     
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  15. Tugboat

    Tugboat Needs to GFH

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    Apparently they're heavy on JuCos who previously held big time offers.

    I think they'll be better this year than last year.
     
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  16. The Dad

    The Dad Brings His Kids Golfing

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    If they are in Ames, they likely profoundly retarded and/or did not live up to their initial offer list.
     
  17. YugoslavianMountainHound

    YugoslavianMountainHound Silver spoon

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    Well considering they were 2-10 and if Iowa wasn't coached by decaying corpses would have been 1-11, that's not much of a stretch.

    If Iowa and UNI can get their shit together this year, ISU has a decent shot of going 0-12. (@Kansas, @Toledo).
     
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  18. eclone

    eclone Former VEISHEA Exec Committee Member

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    Ehh, he's back in summer shape. The tits probably won't be back until about Thanskgiving time.
     
  19. ISUFan98

    ISUFan98 Butterface Administrator

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    Hopefully they're really dumb Jucos who are really good at football. Why they haven't tried to replicate K-State's model all these years is beyond me.
     
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  20. Lime

    Lime Needs to GFH

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    seems like they've tried at various points, they just don't have the greatest college football coach in history
     
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  21. Lime

    Lime Needs to GFH

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    also, it's probably partly because of K-State's history that top JUCO-type recruits go to KS JUCOs but Kansas has a stronger stable of JUCOs. looking at the last few years, KS usually has 15+ top 100 JUCO recruits (FWIW, K-State gets fewer than 5 these days)

    https://rivals.yahoo.com/jcgridiron/football/recruiting/rankings/rank-3508/2015
     
  22. Verbal

    Verbal The Brave Little Poster

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    [​IMG]
     
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  23. FrodoTBaggin

    FrodoTBaggin Balding

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    Love that mean fucker.
     
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  24. HCPhawk

    HCPhawk Needs to GFH

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    I'll always remember Chris Williams talking down to the NDSU guy in his podcast. His shitty little FCS team had no chance against the mighty Cyclones. It's not like ISU had taken a pretty good beat down by an FCS team the previous year or anything. Then of course after they get curb stomped, NDSU is a juggernaut and would probably finish top 25 BCS. A bunch of homer morons, all of em.
     
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  25. YugoslavianMountainHound

    YugoslavianMountainHound Silver spoon

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    That podcast may be the greatest thing ever. NDSU guest flat out calls a 20 point win and Williams and his crony go apeshit. 34-14.
     
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  26. Russell Ziske

    Russell Ziske Needs to GFH

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    Chuck Long's 3 year results vs. ISU are worth mentioning & remembering, as the years pass by.
    Ol' Chuck's teams outscored ISU 177-34 in his 3 games between 83' and 85'.
     
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  27. ClintWalker

    ClintWalker Needs to GFH

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    Rule # 1.....if you're a defensive player chasing a ball carrier on any kind of miss-direction....better have your head on a swivel.
     
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  28. eclone

    eclone Former VEISHEA Exec Committee Member

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    I'm more partial to this one:
    [​IMG]

    although this one is pretty good too:
     
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  29. Hawkstrat

    Hawkstrat Needs to GFH

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    Thanks, coach.
     
  30. Russell Ziske

    Russell Ziske Needs to GFH

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    Congratulations on the Super Bowl wins.
     
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  31. Hawkstrat

    Hawkstrat Needs to GFH

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    I feel like it's almost charitable for Kirk to give ISU fans nearly all of their fondest football moments.
     
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  32. ClintWalker

    ClintWalker Needs to GFH

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    Those games are so hard to take not just because Iowa lost to ISU, but because Iowa lost to really bad ISU teams in Kinnick.
     
  33. FrodoTBaggin

    FrodoTBaggin Balding

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    Kurt is a pathetic pussy.
     
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  34. FrodoTBaggin

    FrodoTBaggin Balding

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    Credit goes to them. That's football.
     
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  35. TH1974

    TH1974 Needs to GFH

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  36. L. Wade Childress

    L. Wade Childress Is Texting Right Now

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    Georges Niang is good for my self-image.

    congrats, fatass, you work out all off-season and look slightly better shirtless than this balding nearly 40 year old white dude.
     
  37. BngHawk

    BngHawk Needs to GFH

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  38. nolookpass

    nolookpass 80085

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    Hard for me to bad mouth a program who pretty regularly beats us home or away
     
  39. Soda Popinski

    Soda Popinski Deadbeat Loser

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    Sure, but feel free to bad mouth their dorky, delusional fans.
     
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  40. Stu Beagle

    Stu Beagle Has Tiny Onions

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  41. eclone

    eclone Former VEISHEA Exec Committee Member

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    The storied Big 10 with a solid three of the bottom 6 teams of all time.
     
  42. TH1974

    TH1974 Needs to GFH

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    Check out the teams with the most wins.
     
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  43. Pseudonym

    Pseudonym Has a Tagline

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    PACK THE JACK!!1!!1
     
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  44. C-3PO

    C-3PO Needs to GFH

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    Hey dipshits, this is a thread an ISU turd would start about Iowa.

    Let's go back to not giving a fuck about ISU.

    Dammit
     
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  45. Matt

    Matt Needs to GFH

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    And Iowa State is a combined 1-8 against those storied Big Ten teams
     
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  46. RecreationalGynecologist

    RecreationalGynecologist Needs to GFH

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    Sick of losing to

    $175? Wow. That's cheap
     
  47. YugoslavianMountainHound

    YugoslavianMountainHound Silver spoon

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    Includes a season parking pass, a $100 credit for concessions and a $100 instant rebate.
     
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  48. Lime

    Lime Needs to GFH

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    you can give the concession credit to Mangino in exchange for the right to call three plays
     
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  49. atemp

    atemp Needs to GFH

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    Chuck Long / Hayden Fry teams outscored Iowa State 167 - 34 from 1983 to 1985. Jim Criner had a better winning percentage than Paul Rhoads does currently.
     
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  50. Jimmie Dimmick

    Jimmie Dimmick Dog Crap Litterer

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    He's right. It is amazing. How can that many people continue to support a terrible product. Are these the people that keep Aldi and TJ Maxx in business?
     

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